Rosie Jones on the fine art of procrastination, as she ignores pressing deadlines to hone gags
This week, like most weeks, has been a little busy. And when I say, “a little busy”, I mean rushed-off-my-feet-no-time-to-sleep busy. I mean, is sleep really necessary?
I’m thinking, no, not really. Apart from the Bags for Life under my eyes, I am really happy, and every morning I wake up with a smile on my face. I still can’t believe that I get paid to make people laugh. I am living the dream.
I started the week by going back to my home town, Bridlington, to be the bit of entertainment at the region’s annual business awards. To be honest, it was strange to go back there. I’d forgotten how small it was. It was like going back in time.
I now live in the big, bad capital, and I’m used to the convenience and ease of London life. It was great to see some familiar faces, though, and it was a dream to perform at Brid’s theatre, the almighty Bridlington Spa, a stage I longed to be on when I was growing up.
Then it was straight back to London to do a couple of charity gigs. I know, I am a great person. The charity gigs this week were to raise money for people with cerebral palsy and for Stonewall.
As a lesbian with CP, these two charities are especially dear to my heart. I often wonder what “good” I do in the world. I am a comedian who earns money by speaking about herself all day, every day.
I quite possibly have the most self-indulgent job in the world. So, sometimes, it’s nice to be a small part of something bigger, and to do a bit of good for once.
While gigging takes up my evenings, my days are spent in coffee shops, trying to order cappuccinos. But, as a result of my slow, slurred speech, I am often being mistaken for an uncertain Cockney – “Cappa tea, no?”
So, while I slurp my third unwanted English Breakfast of the week, I write. I am currently writing a couple of sitcoms, one for Netflix and one for the BBC. Both have imminent deadlines. Naturally, I have spent the majority of this week writing jokes for my Edinburgh show, which is 283 days away. Procrastination at its achingly finest.
The most exciting day this week was Wednesday, when I did a bit of filming for BBC Three. I love filming days, mainly because of hair and make-up.
I never wear make-up usually and I only brush my hair on special days. When I get the opportunity to be pampered, it’s a real treat.
This filming day was extra special because I got to do it with my pal, fellow comedian Helen Bauer. She’s brilliant and very funny, but for God’s sake don’t tell her that, nobody needs their head getting even bigger.
When I’m not gigging, writing, or filming, I am bingeing TV shows. Big time. This week, I’ve gobbled up the entire series of Killing Eve and the entire series of The Bisexual, both of which I highly recommend.
They are flawless, and I now have two new major crushes: Jodie Comer and Maxine Peake. Dear Lord, they are magnificent.
Right, I’d better go. I’m just about to board a plane to Ireland. This weekend I am performing at Vodafone Comedy Carnival Galway. I’ve never been to the Emerald Isle before, and I’m rather excited to spend a long weekend drinking Guinness. Anybody know a good hangover cure?
Rosie Jones is a comedian and writer.