Football was made for the content machine.
It taps into our tribalism and elicits the knee-jerk reactions and extreme opinions that are catnip for the algorithms. How else can we explain the rise of Arsenal Fan TV?
Ever since 2006, however, a rational alternative has been quietly chugging along at the top of the football podcast charts. Helmed from 2017 by the cheerful Max Rushden and (playing Eeyore to Rushden’s Tigger) Barry Glendenning, The Guardian Football Weekly eschews the kind of squealing debates you might have seen Jamie Carragher and Gary Neville engage in on Monday Night Football for something a little more levelheaded and lighthearted.
That said, they never shy away from tackling the big issues such as sportswashing and racism, devoting standalone episodes to them.
It helps that they have The Guardian’s all-star writing team to draw on. The forward line consists of Barney Ronay, Jonathan Liew and Jonathan Wilson, who prove to be just as dispassionate and articulate at the mic as they are on the page.
If this is all sounding too “centrist dad-cast”, rest assured that there’s a strong rotating squad of diverse pundits, which allows the team to cover the game from all angles.
I always look forward to Nicky Bandini’s Serie A updates. Nedum Onuoha has brought a fascinating player’s perspective to the podcast, and Faye Carruthers has now expanded her women’s football brief into a fully-fledged Women’s Football Weekly.
But I think that Rushden is right in that we “come for the games and stay for the people”. I’m partial to a culinary misadventure from the vegetable-averse Mark Langdon.
A friend of mine says one of his favourite recurring moments is when – off on his righteous rants about the latest Fifa corruption scandal – Philippe Auclair turns the air blue.
My MVP, though, will always be Wilson, who is probably the closest thing football has to a walking encyclopaedia. I’ll never forget his homage to the late Diego Maradona, a mere five minutes into their emergency tribute episode in 2020.
Blending Argentinian history with pure poetry, Wilson conjured up a quasi-mythical figure whose impoverished origins and cunning style made him not just a great footballer but one who perfectly mirrored his country’s self-image.
It was so definitive that, when he had finally finished, Auclair asked, only half-jokingly: “Shall we go home now?”
My only worry is that the pod might have overreached itself by one episode too many. We’re seeing in football that planning more fixtures isn’t necessarily a good thing, as overworked players produce tired games. And I imagine Langdon only has so many vegetable stories to share.