Love is Blind comes to the UK, the Olympics wind down in Paris and a woman discovers the power of reality-splitting orgasms.
Love is Blind UK
Wednesday
Netflix
Husband-and-wife duo Emma Willis (The Voice UK) and Matt Willis (Madness in the Method) present the British version of the reality show, which sees couples get engaged before they’ve met face-to-face.
With contestants all looking to find The One, the stakes couldn’t be higher. Confined to pods where they can’t see their potential partners, will true love blossom? Or will the tension, jealousy and sometimes-infuriating sense of mystery get the better of them?
Crime
Wednesday
ITV1, 9.00pm
The second series adapting Irvine Welsh’s detective novel of the same name gets a terrestrial outing.
Dougray Scott (My Week with Marilyn) stars as DI Ray Lennox, a cop with a less-than-peachy past. Series one saw Lennox grapple with the Confectioner, a serial killer whose crimes pushed the Detective Inspector back to drink and drugs. Now, Lennox has to leave the case in the past and prove he can still do the job that gives his life meaning.
Slip
Thursday
ITVX
Mae Cannon (Zoe Lister-Jones, How It Ends) is in the middle of a one night stand when she discovers her orgasms open up portals to alternate versions of her life. We’ve all been there.
The decisions she’s taken in this life have led to a rather dull existence. Her thirties are coming to an end, and her long-term relationship is rumbling on; neither prospect fills her with much excitement. A journey through parallel universes, and her own regrets, ensues.
The Umbrella Academy
Thursday
Netflix
The adaptation of Gerard Way and Gabriel Bá’s comic book series reaches its fourth and final series.
So far, the superhero siblings have dealt with death, living on the Moon, time travel, JFK, assassins, the grandfather paradox and the end of the world. It’s hard to see how things could get any more stressful, but if there’s any show that can perpetually up the ante, it’s The Umbrella Academy.
This time round, the gang are without their powers, just in time to face off against the mysterious Keepers.
Olympics Closing Ceremony
Sunday
BBC One, 7.00pm
Paris 2024 has seen it all: world records smashed, sporting history made and Twitter losing its mind over how cool the shooters look.
However, the opening ceremony received some criticism for a supposedly lacklustre show, performances from Lady GaGa and Celine Dion notwithstanding. After leaving some viewers cold (and participants wet), can Paris stick the landing with an unforgettable closing ceremony?